I want to apologize. It's been almost six months since I have last blogged and I feel like I need to explain a few things. When I started this blog on February 13th, 2014 (Happy One Year Anniversary Germerican!) I was so motivated and excited about having my own little corner of the internet, talking about what I love and maybe creating someones favorite webpage. Looking back 2014 was probably the worst time for me to start a blog. At first I was very busy with graduation from school and thinking about what I would like to do next. The next step in my life. First I thought about going to University right away, but I wasn't really passionate about the courses I had originally chosen and I ended up deciding that I wanted to do a few internships to find out what I enjoy and what not before I go to University, but I feel like at the same time I was trying to find out who I am at a person and what my place is in this world. Not going to lie, those months were pretty hard. I wasn't too busy with my internship (although I enjoyed it) and after a while I felt useless and stupid for deciding against starting University in the fall. I felt like a total loser and I wasn't happy with the life I was living. My parents and best friends were so supportive. They listened to me crying over the same thing over and over again and tried to help me out of my little hole. At the same time some things changed around me and I was constantly anxious. Me stressing about life wasn't helping my anxious moments at all. Things were building up so much that I got an panic attack during a very awesome Ed Sheeran concert that I attended with my best friends. I think that was the point were I realized that I am not 100% okay. It sounds stupid, but just the fact that my life wasn't working out the way I wanted it to be made me feel so bad. In December I started a job at a shoe boutique to make some extra money for University and things gotten better. On New Years Eve, while watching the fireworks with my gorgeous best friend, everything changed. It sounds so cliché, but all of a sudden I saw things clearly for the first time in months! I knew what I wanted in life and I knew who I wanted to have around.
I won't call 2014 the worst year of my life, because not everything was bad, just my school situation sucked and at the time I couldn't focus on anything else. 2015 on the other hand has been great so far. I have distanced myself from people who don't want my best or don't bring out the best in me and I feel really good about it. I don't regret that choice at all. I have decided for myself that I want 2015 to be the year I focus on myself and my happiness and so far, so good. It's only March but I truly believe that 2015 is going to be a lot of fun. On New Years Eve I have decided that I want to spend my money on other things than shopping. Don't get me wrong, I will still buy lots of clothes and accessories (I have bought two designer handbags so far, stay tuned for a blog post), but I also want to invest in trips and adventures. Last month I spend a lovely week on the spanish island Fuerteventura with my mom and so far I have another two trips planned which I will eventually blog about. Also, since I am telling you all about my past months and what the future will bring, so far I have gotten accepted to two Universities in the Netherlands, which I am thrilled about, but I will talking about University in another blog post I think. Oh and speaking of change, I recently have started out working 5 times a week, including doing Yoga, and I feel awesome. I highly advice everyone who gets stressed out easily to try out Yoga.
Sorry for the unstructured and very long blog post, but I felt like I owed those of you who actually like to read my blog a explanation. YES, I will continue blogging. Last night I actually thought about deleting the blog, but my lovely Lindsey basically forbid me to do it - you should thank her. No, but really. I want to feel excited about my blog again and I have already planned a thing or two.
Thank you for reading this post and if you have any questions or suggestions on what I could blog about send me an email to: germerican-lj@gmx.de or tweet me: @germerican_lj.
I am excited of what the future brings.
Lots of love,
L.
PS: I would like to say thank you to my parents, sister and amazing friends Alicia, Carina, Heather, Lara & Lindsey. You all have been so supportive during the last six months and I love each and single one of you lots and lots and lots. You guys are the greatest humans exciting on this planet and I feel sorry for everyone who doesn't know you. Also thanks to Kirsten who is the funniest person I know. That deserved to be mentioned in this post. X's & O's.
PPS: I don't have long hair anymore. In February I had 10 inches cut off, which I have donated to the Little Princess Trust - an organization that makes wigs for little girls who suffer from cancer. Check them out.
Okay. Bye now. X
Keine Kommentare:
Kommentar veröffentlichen